Up to Me Page 9

  The build-up is too much, the pleasure too strong. My body feels like it’s coming apart at the seams. Just before I squeeze my eyes shut, I see Cash come up onto his knees. I give myself up to feeling as he spreads my legs wide and rubs my most sensitive part with his thumb, all the while driving in and out of me.

  And then I’m toppling over the edge. The first wave of my orgasm makes me dizzy. I hear Cash saying my name over and over. I open my eyes to see him arch his back and pound into me with a recklessness that bursts in my body like a shower of fireworks.

  The walls absorb his groan as his pace slows to longer, more languid strokes. His body still pulses within me. Then, with one final thrust, he collapses onto me.

  We rest together, drifting back down to earth. His breathing is heavy in my ear. When it becomes less labored, I feel the first press of his lips against my neck. It’s one of a thousand tiny kisses he rains over my throat and my face. When he lifts his head, his eyes meet mine. I’m not sure what they say, but I think my heart understands.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN- Cash

  With Olivia tucked along my side, I really don’t want to move. But I have to. Reality—and danger—are lurking just around the corner. On the other side of daylight, which is just a few short hours away.

  Olivia is tracing the tattoo on the left side of my chest, like she often does when we lie naked together. I don’t know if it’s soothing to her, but it is to me.

  Her fingers start to move more and more slowly until they stop. Her breathing becomes deep and even. She’s so still I know she’s asleep. I’m sure she’s exhausted. But there’s nothing I can do about that yet.

  I slide out from under her as gently as I can, but I still wake her.

  “Rest, baby. I’ll be right back.”

  I can see that her eyes are open and focused on mine, so I know she heard me. She doesn’t answer, though. She just smiles.

  After straightening my clothes, I head out through the office to the club. Nash and Gavin are sitting at the bar, pouring shots from a bottle of whiskey.

  “Make yourself at home,” I remark smartly as I approach.

  “Oh, don’t worry. We have,” Gavin replies with a cheeky grin.

  I pull up a stool and a shot, downing it in one quick swallow. The burn is welcome. It reminds me that there will be much pain and loss if I don’t do this just right. The first time. There’s no doubt that I won’t get a second chance.

  “I was thinking about it and I feel like the only place Olivia will really be safe is with her mother.”

  “That’s what you were doing back there? Thinking about that chick’s mother?” Nash asks snidely. “If she mentions needing a real man, send her my way.”

  “Spending so much time alone with a bunch of men on a boat, I’m sure you could recommend one.”

  Gavin spits whiskey across the bar.

  Nash stands so quickly his stool falls over. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  I stand, too. “It means that you even think about touching her, talking to her, so much as looking at her and we’re gonna have a big, big problem, bro.”

  Before Nash and I can get chest to chest, Gavin steps between us. Again.

  “I’m not going to be able to leave you two alone at all, am I?”

  He gives us each a little shove, which, coming from Gavin, is nearly enough to send us back a step. Nearly, but not quite.

  Gavin pours three more shots and slides one to me and one to Nash, picking up the third and holding it up between us. “To safety and success. Salut!”

  Nash and I are still eyeing each other, but we toast to Gavin. It’s a good sentiment, one worth taking a moment to recognize.

  After a short pause, I clear my throat, saying pointedly, “As I was saying, I was thinking that the only place Olivia can really be safe is at her mother’s. Since her parents divorced, Olivia hasn’t been close to her. They rarely talk and I doubt anyone would be able to find her there very easily. In fact, I’m not even sure where she lives. Seems like I heard Olivia mention Savannah, but I can’t be sure. At any rate, I’ll find out.”

  “So you’re sending her there, hoping they won’t follow you? And that you’ll make it back in time?” Nash asks sharply. I grit my teeth and try not to take exception to his tone.

  “No, I’m sending her with Gavin. You and I are going to be taking care of the trade tomorrow.”

  Nash smirks. “Afraid to leave her alone with me, huh?”

  “Yes. I am. She needs protection. Competent protection. That’s why I’m sending Gavin. I know he’s capable of keeping her safe.”

  Nash rolls his eyes but says nothing. At least he’s learning to keep his mouth shut.

  I turn to Gavin. “Man, I’m trusting you.”

  He looks me in the eye and I try to convey all that I mean when I say that. I’m trusting him to respect me by not touching her. I’m trusting him to keep my secrets, to keep Olivia safe, to do whatever he has to in order to protect her. This is not a simple request and he knows it. The fact that he pauses to really consider what I’m asking makes me feel somewhat better, like he’s not taking it lightly.

  “I know, mate. You know I’ve got your back. And hers. We’re brothers.” Gavin holds out his hand, arm bent at the elbow. When I take it, we’re both agreeing to do right by one another, no matter what the cost. This isn’t a game. We both know that.

  “Brothers,” I repeat.

  “I hope he’s a better brother to you than he was to me,” Nash mumbles from the other side of Gavin as he pours himself another drink.

  I ignore him.

  “I’ll find out exactly where you’re taking her, where her mom is living now. Give me a few minutes head start and then meet me at the hotel. Sound good?”

  Gavin nods. “Sounds good. And safe. Just make sure you’re not followed.” I give Gavin a look and he grins and throws up his hands. “Sorry. Habit. I know you’re as careful as you can be.”

  “Especially when it’s important.”

  He nods again. “And this girl is obviously very important.”

  I don’t answer. I don’t know what to say. It’s true, of course. I just haven’t really thought of it that way—of her being important to me or the exact degree to which she’s important to me.

  But it’s a lot. There’s no doubt about that.

  “Just stick with the plan and do what I ask and I think we can pull this off.” I look behind Gavin to Nash. He’s pretending to ignore me. “Can I trust you to do what needs to be done?”

  Slowly, Nash turns his cool eyes on me. “Yes, but when it’s over, and you and your girlfriend are all safe and sound, it’s my turn. My turn to get what I want.”

  Revenge is in his eyes. I recognize it because I fought the urge for a lot of years. And I lost for the most part. I just found less…violent ways to exact it. Or at least to try. Giving these books up will set me back years, but it’s worth it to make sure Olivia’s safe. I can start again, maybe talk some sense into Nash and get him to let me use what he’s got. I don’t know, but I can’t worry about all that now. Tonight the most important thing is getting Olivia to safety. Tomorrow will come soon enough.

  “Fair enough. But right now, it’s my way.”

  He looks at me long and hard before he nods.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN- Olivia

  Rest? While he’s out there plotting and planning with his not-dead twin brother and probably-more-than-he-seems club manager? I think not!

  By the time Cash comes back in, I’m up and dressed. Waiting.

  As always, just the sight of him kindles a fire in the pit of my stomach. His very presence touches me. It’s undeniable.

  I take a deep breath, pushing those feelings aside so I can think.

  “So, what’s the plan?”

  Cash looks back out into his office. “Have a seat. We’ll be right back out.” I hear snickering that presumably belongs to the pleasant and mildly flirtatious Gavin. I can’t imagine Nash snickering. I can b
arely imagine him smiling. I think his default mode is “menace”.

  Cash closes the door and turns to me. I can see by his expression that he thinks I’m not going to like what he’s about to say, which makes me think I won’t.

  I sigh. “This must be a humdinger.”

  He chuckles. “What? I haven’t even said anything yet.”

  “You don’t have to. That look says it all. It makes my butt pucker.”

  “Makes your butt pucker?” I nod and he laughs outright. Shaking his head, an amused expression still on his face, Cash reaches out and pulls me into his arms, snugging me up against his chest. “You’re crazy, you know that, right?”

  “Of course. Was it supposed to be a secret?”

  “No, I think that ship has sailed.”

  I turn my head slightly and bite his flat male nipple.

  “Ouch! Keep doing that and you’ll get the best damn spanking you’ve ever had.”

  “I’ve never been spanked before, so the bar is set very low.”

  “Well, that’ll be the first thing on the agenda when I get you back home then.”

  I lean further back. “Get me back home? Where am I going?”

  Cash sighs. “Your mother’s house. It’s the safest place for you right now.”

  I push out of his arms. “What? You can’t be serious! There are a dozen places I can think of right off the top of my head that would be safe and give me a reasonable expectation of retaining my sanity. Why in the world would you want me there?”

  “Because there is a recent trail to almost everyone else in your life. Everyone except her. You haven’t talked to her in how long?”

  “A couple years, but that’s not the point.”

  “That’s exactly the point. Where else would you be less expected to go?”

  My mind goes completely blank, probably because he’s right.

  Dammit!

  “Fine, but you’ll have to let me drive myself. She would never understand something like this.”

  Already, Cash is shaking his head. “Nope. Sorry. Gavin will be taking you and staying with you until it’s time to bring you back.”

  “What? No way! If I have to take someone, why can’t it be you?” The more I think of it, the more I like that scenario. That way, Cash would be sure to be safe.

  “Gavin is the most…capable one of us. You’ll be safe with him, no matter what comes up.”

  “Are you expecting an army of mafia bandits to accost me at my mother’s house?”

  “I’m not expecting anything. But I’m going to be prepared for…whatever.”

  “If Gavin’s the most capable one, maybe you should send him to make the trade with Nash.”

  “I have to go. I have to do this. I can’t trust Nash with it. I need to make sure it gets done and it gets done right. I can’t have them threatening you, Olivia. This has to stop.”

  “But…but…”

  I can’t think of a single argument other than I want him with me and I want him to be safe. Neither of those are enough to change his mind, though.

  “This is the best way. The only way. Just trust me. Can you do that?”

  Cash’s head is tilted slightly to the side and he’s looking deep into my eyes. He’s so sincere.

  I feel the sting of tears at the backs of my eyes. With a fist lodged in my throat, I don’t even try to speak. I just nod and drop my eyes to Cash’s mouth.

  Tenderly, he pulls me back into his arms. He strokes my hair and rubs circles on my back. “I’ll keep you safe. I promise.”

  “It’s not me I’m worried about,” I murmur against his chest.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN- Cash

  The ride to the hotel with Olivia is a special kind of torture. Even after devouring her an hour ago, I still feel that familiar twitch in my dick when her hands stray too low on my stomach. With my eyes wide open, I can still picture her tiny hands wrapped around my shaft, picture her lips closing over the glistening tip.

  And thoughts like that aren’t helping.

  The other thing that makes it torture is knowing that I’m leaving her in someone else’s hands. I hate that. I told her Gavin is the most capable, which is probably true from a technical standpoint. But I feel like there is no one that would risk more for her, no one else who would care as much for her safety as I would. As I do.

  But it has to be done. My presence alone brings danger right to her doorstep. And that’s unacceptable. Until I get this under control, this is the best thing for her.

  Even if it doesn’t feel like the best thing for me.

  ********

  Olivia is quiet all the way through the lobby, in the elevator and into the room. She doesn’t say a word as she packs what few things she’d taken out of her bag back into it. I feel the need to lighten things up for her. I don’t want her leaving on this note. I don’t want either one of us leaving on this note.

  Before she zips her bag, I pull out a pair of her panties and hold them up.

  “Can I keep these? I promise they won’t end up strung up in the bar.”

  “Give me those,” she says halfheartedly, reaching for them.

  I jerk them away from her grasping fingers.

  “No. I think I’ve earned at least one pair.”

  “So you like girl’s underwear, huh? I never would’ve guessed it.”

  “They don’t make ‘em big enough for what I’d have to put in them,” I tease.

  She grins at that and replies, “Fine. Keep them. I think I’ve got plenty to last me for a while.”

  I peek inside her bag. “Oh, yeah. You’re good. I mean, you won’t be changing them nearly as often without me around.” I give her my most devilish grin and feel gratified when her cheeks turn rosy.

  “That’s probably true. In fact, now that I think about your effect on my underwear, you probably owe me several pair. I seem to remember a couple pair getting torn.”

  “Mmm, that’s right. How could I forget? I’m surprised your dad didn’t hear all that moaning you were doing.”

  Her mouth drops open and her cheeks burn a little brighter. “Maybe that was you. I seem to remember you being extremely excited.”

  “Baby, I was very excited. You do all kinds of delicious things to me. Which makes me want to do all kinds of delicious things to you.”

  “Um, I’m pretty sure you did.”

  “Listen, why don’t you just ‘accidentally’ leave all these at your mother’s house? If you come home without any, I promise I’ll make sure you don’t miss them for one second.”

  “Commando’s not my thing. Now Ginger on the other hand…”

  “Oh, God!” I exclaim, closing my eyes and turning my head.

  “What? Ginger’s gorgeous!”

  “If you’re into that sort of thing.”

  “What’s ‘that sort of thing’?”

  “Well, she’s just so…blond and so…plastic and so…feline.”

  Olivia laughs. “I thought guys liked that kind of thing.”

  “Some do.”

  “Well evidently you do, too. Taryn is all those things, too, only Ginger has a personality.”

  “Okay, then I used to like that kind of thing. Now I like your kind of thing. It’s the very best kind of thing. Makes all other kinds of things look like shit.”

  “Well, far be it for me to cause you to conjure mental images of shit without panties.”

  “Can we not talk about shit and panties in the same sentence?”

  “You’re the one that was talking about panties and lack thereof.”

  “Oh my God! I can barely remember that far back. Too many traumatic things have been said since then.”

  “It was forty-five seconds ago.”

  “Told you it was traumatic.”

  She laughs again, and this time, the sparkle in her eye is back. Just like I like it.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN- Olivia

  Cash’s teasing makes it easy to forget what’s about to happen, but the sharp knock at the door bring
s reality with it.

  “Who’s that?” I ask.

  “Gavin.”

  “We’re leaving from here?”

  “Yes. I thought it would be safer. On the off chance anyone followed me here, they wouldn’t see Gavin and know to look for him. He should be parked on the next street over. This way I know no one will see you and be able to follow you to your mom’s. They’ll still be watching for me.”

  “So you’ll be by yourself.” Fear nips at my insides, making them quiver.

  “Just for a while. Nash and I have a plan for tomorrow.”

  “Care to tell me what that is? Or would you rather I not know?”

  He eyes me with a strange expression. I’m not sure what to make of it. My mind and my heart are all over the place.

  “I don’t mind you knowing if you’re interested.”

  “Of course I’m interested! I’m worried about you!”

  “Hey, I’m just asking. I don’t want to assume anything with you.”

  That sparks my anger. How in the world could he think I’m not interested? Granted, I’ve had some doubts resurface over the last day or two, but I don’t think I’ve ever given him the impression that I don’t care.

  Have I?

  The momentary uncertainty is like a wake-up call. I can’t let all this go down with Cash thinking that I don’t care. I couldn’t live with that.

  “Cash, I’m very interested. And I care very much about what happens to you. I know I’ve got some…issues to work out, but that has more to do with me than you. You’re…you’re…” Words fail me as my throat closes around a knot of agony. I pause to regroup before I continue. “You’re important to me. And I know you’re a good guy. Deep down, I know it. And I trust you. I really do. It’s just hard to describe how I feel sometimes. But please, please don’t ever think I don’t care.”

  He smiles down at me, moving in to brush his lips over mine. “Okay, okay. I believe you. And I know what you’re saying. I feel the same way.” His expression sobers. “It’s not always easy for me to say what I feel, but I want you to know I—”